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Break The Cycle of Emotional Unavailability live

MODULE 3 – What’s driving your pattern?

The aim of this week is to finally understand what’s been going on behind the scenes in your subconscious and holding you back from being in the type of relationship you need, desire and deserve.

This section features the key tasks for this week and, where appropriate, additional resources.

What’s Driving Your Pattern? audio

Before you do step three or beyond of Break The Cycle, it’s important for you to do the previous steps.

It’s also important to do the steps in order.

Step Three: What’s Going On?

First, choose the step 3 sheet(s) that best cover your situation/cycle:

#1 Alone

#2 Recently Broken Up

#3 Single but dating (includes casual relationships/flings/short involvements you thought would be longer)

#4 In a relationship (under 3 years)

#5 In a long-term relationship (+3 years or married)

#6 In an affair

#7 Any form of rescuing/remodelling pattern

#8 Secret or fantasy relationship

Are You Making You Special?
| download the PDF 
– this will help you with part of step 3 if you’re looking for some ‘inspiration’

Next, watch the Step 3 explainer video when you’re finished. | AUDIO version

Subconscious Agenda Examples | download the PDF

You Can Figure Out Your Subconscious Agenda
| download the PDF

Don’t forget to revisit your Circle of Trust. Does what drives your pattern explain why you haven’t been experiencing what you want?

Want to do extra?

The following exercises are really useful for understanding your needs further, something that you’re doing week by week here on Break The Cycle. These extra exercises are optional — only do what you’re open to doing and have the bandwidth for.

Figure Out Your Voids | download the pdf

What’s Driving You? needs exercise | download the pdf – If you want to fill out the ‘What’s Driving You?’ pdf instead of printing out, here are instructions for doing this.

Follow-up guide for What’s Driving you? needs exercise | download the pdf

If you’re unsure about your ‘top 8’ from the What’s Driving You? needs exercise, email your filled-out exercise to and I will let you know what I think your top 8 are during my next Office Hours session (Wednesdays). Please note that I don’t look at what you’ve put until afterwards. I include a brief explanation of why I chose those eight.

Watch/listen to 'What's driving your pattern?'
Complete Step 3
Read "Are you making you 'special'?"
Watch Step 3 explainer video *after* completing Step 3
Read the subconscious agenda examples
Read 'You Can Figure Out Your Subconscious Agenda' explainer
Review your Circle of Trust
These are core resources that are the foundations of the Baggage Reclaim philosophy. I refer to them time and time and time again—they are all powerful tools that have been a fundamental part of my own transformation.

Clearing & Releasing Emotional Charge

How To Self-Soothe

Get Out Of Stuck | Beliefs Prompt | Get Out Of Stuck Quick Sheet | Beliefs Brainstorm Worksheet

Journaling Tips

Self-Care Practices For Working With Me

Feelings Diary | Journaling Guide

The Unsent Letter Guide

How to Write Letters to Your Younger Self

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