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Changing Your Perspective On Complacency: Tackle The 'Accepting Me Is Complacency Myth'


This class is ideal for anyone who is struggling with accepting that you can be 'good enough' right now and who knows that they're a perfectionist.

There is this idea held by many people who struggle with loving themselves and their identities, that if you accept yourself you'll be complacent. You won't want to evolve, grow, or even change where necessary.

Here's the thing: That is complete bullshit (BS). Think about it - the people who say this don't like or love themselves and often morph, adapt, twist, contort and act like human Transformers to accommodate what they think that others want. i.e. they do not accept themselves. Clearly this is distorted thinking.

Not liking you, not accepting you aka rejecting you, is not going to inspire you to be a better person and in fact, you become complacent because you have no self-esteem left to grow with! If you're waiting for that point where you hate yourself so much that you feel 'inspired', don't bother - it won't make you change; it'll make you give up, curl into a ball or latch onto the nearest assclown.

Accept who you are NOW as in right now in the present. This doesn't mean that you cannot evolve and address any areas of work, but know and accept you.

I've made a lot of changes in my life and you know what? It's not because I was a terrible person and needed to make me a 'better' person; I accepted who I was including my past, my strengths, my weaknesses, my mistakes and essentially who I was and sought to have a better life. I made these changes because of the unhappiness in my life and because I was unhappy with that unhappiness, but the truth is, I didn't change when I was at my most miserable or disliked myself the most. I changed when I stopped judging and punishing me and instead accepted who I was and started taking care of what that was.

Complacency actually comes in more than one guise, i.e. it's not always about being 'smug' about yourself and not opening you up to any self-evaluation or change.

If you hang onto this idea that you're not good enough or lovable, that it's 'too late' etc THAT is what complacency looks like. It's the lazy option because the alternative is action. Sticking with the former way of thinking will limit you and keep you in an uncomfortable comfort zone.

If you have low self-esteem and you keep judging you, ruminating, running you down and not challenging it and essentially defaulting to a line of thinking and behaviour that dislikes you and blames you, THAT is what complacency looks like.

Accepting who you are is not about being complacent. It is about appreciation, acknowledgement, care, love, trust and respect of who you are as a person now, being honest about your strengths and weaknesses and learning as you go so that you can grow and evolve.

There is no growth in BS.

Rejection starts at home hence if you want to reduce the amount of rejection in your life you can start by not rejecting you first.

Stop judging you and start working on how you can be happy in your own skin right now and what you can do to continue improving your life. Remember also that it is difficult to change if you don't accept who you are in the first place and who you are is not some awful person so you must start to appreciate you and appreciate your life.

Let go of the limiting beliefs - check out the Get Out Of Stuck Guide and also work with the Doubt, Blame and Fear Buster workbooks which are all available from the course page.

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