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The Library

MAY 2016


It's my time now and I'm ready to stand up for me.

This month's theme is standing up for yourself because you know what? There is no perfect time to be you; there is only now. Happiness isn't something that you delay until some arbitrary point in the future, or something that needs to be based on you being or doing certain things that you think will give you the permission to finally be you. Your time is now so this month it's all about recognising that you don't need to wait around for everything and everyone else to change, nor do you need to deprioritise you. You matter too.

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This month's pre-recorded webinar: 15 Compelling Reasons for Making Standing Up For Yourself, Your #1 Priority

The Library Podcast Ep 1: How I learned to stand up for Nat

Each month you will enjoy access to a podcast episode created exclusively for members where I will share on an experience I’ve been through and highlight ways to get out of your own way, how to reduce ‘baggage’, and how to turn those head-wrecking and painful experiences into a gift. 

Listen below or download here.

Code Red & Amber Cheat Sheet

Do you tend to second-guess yourself about what is unfair and unreasonable? Have you painted red flags green in the past or felt frustrated because you noticed certain things that while they were not red alerts, they were amber warnings that could be used to help you out? I created this 'cheat sheet' as a quick guide to helping you supercharge your gut, intuition, and boundaries. Just like traffic lights, code amber is stop, look, listen and don't proceed until it is safe to do so, and code red is halt, do not pass GO. It's a one-pager so that you can print it out and put it on a wall or keep it close at hand. For a primer on code amber and code red issues, read this post on Baggage Reclaim.


The Blame Buster Guide

The only time when you can take sole responsibility for something is where there are no other parties involved and you are solely in control of all elements of the situation. What you cannot take responsibility for is other people’s actions, especially if it goes along the lines of them doing/saying/being something that you don’t like or that causes you pain, and you then seeing this as a reflection of your inadequacies.

What you need to do is blast through blame and move to responsibility or making a choice to let go, so that you have the self-compassion and energy to look at now and ahead and get on with your own life. While blame is about avoidance of responsibility, this process isn't about taking responsibility for various elements of a situation but more about letting go of blame so that you can take responsibility for your own life and happiness. Blame is a distraction from this--it’s a distraction from action.

The Blame Buster Guide workbook has a several ideas for blasting through blame and letting go of it. Blame is a burden–drop it and you will lighten your load and leave room for happiness.



Or download ePub (for mobile apps)

60 Tips to Build Your Self-Esteem

Take care of you in the day-to-day and it is a lot easier to deal with the inevitable conflicts and issues that life throws your way. You will also be receptive to recognising, receiving, enjoying and contributing to the inevitable good things that life throws your way.

Originally created for the Build Your Self-Esteem course, this mini ebook is packed with tips to help you stick to the habit of liking and loving you.  The tips are a mix of what I have learned and tried on my own self-esteem journey as well as some that have been shared by readers and friends.

Remember that if you’ve had a habit of low self-esteem for some time, it's unrealistic to expect that you will try out something and shazam everything is 'fixed', so incorporate building your self-esteem (self-care) into your daily routine and know that it will take some time for your new habits to feel natural.


Build Your Self-Esteem


Harnessing The Power of Affirmations (eBook)

I've experienced increasing inner peace ever since I started taking care of my emotional and mental health through self-esteem driven activities and thinking. I’ve put together this guide because if like me, your inner critic, your inner child, and that pleaser part of you, have at times dominated your life, you can learn supportive, soothing ways to take command of you and improve your well-being.

Think of this guide as an introduction to affirmations with a Baggage Reclaim twist. I share how I use them, what their purpose can be, and how to get up and running.

Affirmations have been a pivotal part of enhancing my self-care, especially since I stopped over-analysing them and instead noted the effect that they have on my body and state of mind. I used to be super-sceptical of affirmations and now I'm of the attitude, Is it worth a try? Does it help to change my emotional, mental or physical state in some positive way?  It took me until 2011 to fully acknowledge just how beneficial they are to me but I've inadvertently been talking gently to me, reframing things positively and yes, talking me off the proverbial ledge at times, since the summer of 2005 right before I started Baggage Reclaim.

Life still chucks its inevitable bumps at me but I’m able to return to a sense of self that leaves me feeling reassured and safe within. And it’s off of my own steam! Yes–you can be the source of your esteem and comfort.


Harnessing The Power of Affirmations


JOURNALING PROMPTS: Are You Hobbling Yourself At The Starting Blocks With These Limiting Beliefs?

Limiting beliefs not only stand in the way of you representing your needs, expectations, desires, feelings and opinions, but they also limit your perception of you and encroach on what you believe are your opportunities and capabilities. Use the prompts to open up an honest conversation with you about the origins of these beliefs so that they don't hide out and continue to wreak havoc behind the scenes.


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An Introduction to Boundaries

Originally created for Build Your Self-Esteem, think of this video as a primer on boundaries. Discover common reasons why people lack boundaries, get an introduction to what boundaries are and what they involve, and find out why communication isn’t all verbal and why boundaries are primarily for you not just about others.  I explain why boundaries are a source of empowerment and respect not loneliness and why it's critical to stop taking ownership of other people's behaviour.

Watch the video below:



Nat's Journey With No Contact

Originally created for a course I ran about No Contact, if you've ever wrestled with your conscience about doing No Contact or wondered how other people get through it, I share how I walked that path of No Contact and turned it into something that gave me back myself and strengthened my emotional backbone.

Watch the video below:






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